The sinking ship

'The dastardly terror attacks that took place in Mumbai last night and today leading to the loss of many precious lives and injuries to many others have deeply shocked the nation. I strongly condemn these acts of senseless violence against innocent people, including guests from foreign countries.'- Manmohan Singh

What would a bureaucrat say that hasn't been already said. Mumbai, the Greatest Indian city has been a mute witness to previous attacks. Mumbaikars have always found courage and pride post a terror attack to get back on their feet and steady themselves. The Phoenix has always risen from the ashes. This latest attack, however is quite different for a number of reasons per Se.

This time, the Corporate face of India has been hit badly. The Taj Hotel, a century old in fires. When would one have pictured such a situation. This is a direct hit on a Country whose face value is often synonymous with growth, power and urban development. One with many phases and faces. One with dreams. One with an unimaginable urban rural divide. One where realities hit hard.

Over 150 dead. Mr Patil seemed so indifferent again. He's more concerned about his frigging looks. One expects a leader to show emotions. Yet his voice was so monotonous, lacking urgency. Money was promised again. A poor little taxi driver lost 7 of his family members. What kind of hope would keep him going? What will he do with the money. It will never get his kin back. He will never get rid of the guilt, even though he's guilty of nothing. Blame he will take for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Justice is such an ambiguous term. It surely won't be delivered soon. There is no political will to say that this wouldn't happen again. The bureaucrats would be thinking- 'aaj ki maal nahi mili'. The political forces unified just in front of the camera.

Common man cannot even vent his anger. If one makes derogatory comments, he is quickly apprehended. This blogging portal isn't safe either. The Mumbaikar couldn't even watch t.v as it was blank. No source of information on the attacks. The fear and the anger all magnified by frightening proportions. Must we get used to this Orwellian environment, with Big Brother watching us, rather than the damn militants? They came, they saw and fired. And our intelligence was sitting on its backside and sipping ice candy!!! We better get used to this soon.
But in all this chaos, i see hope. Hope for "change" (as Obama puts it). The vital ingredients for such a change being, next time, a few vvips lying in a pool of blood. This collage of images will be etched on my mind forever. Hope, my friend, is a dicey emotion! Jai Hind!

P:S- A ship with many innocents is sinking fast. An s.o.s call was sounded ages ago. Will we respond? Perhaps one of the innocents is a protege of a bureaucrat.

Up the irons!!!

It was 18:43 Indian standard time( I remember this clearly because i glanced at my watch). After my usual quota of mail checking and googling nonsense, i visited the Iron Maiden website,partly because i was pretty bored (I was humming an maiden tune so this could be why). Then out of the blue, i see this icon that says that they're going to embark on a return leg of their very successful world tour. My heart skips a beat (maybe even 3:P). I scroll down to read further and then i see 'Bangalore' clearly highlighted.

What can i say. This was probably my most pleasing and gleeful moment of the whole year.Easily. I fumble with my phone, can't wait to call up my maiden buddies and break them the "news". For obvious reasons, I'm restless. My body is trembling. An exuberant shudder flows through my spine!!! Hell this is huge.

As i look back and ponder my reactions, i realise why i felt that way. Simply put- Maiden writes about things that matter. War and Religion, hope and solace, Death and destruction. These are matters of colossal interest to me. We're all looking for answers to life's testing questions.
What Maiden really does, is provide a vent where they, along with their zillions of fans, unite for a common cause. One where we're encouraged to step out of our safety zones, one where we should follow our hearts. If it's metal, then it has to be Iron Maiden.
Bruce always puts a lot of emotions into his voice. He has what one would call "ownage".When the air raid siren is going to say- scream for me BANGALORE!!(at high octaves:d), he knows what's coming onto him- A humdinger of a time. 15 Feb 2009, I'm already counting the days.See you fellow maiden-heads there.
P:S- Isn't it ironic how our parents would say they're noise, but we consider them to be Gods!!

Oppenheimer's guilt

The 'Aryans' tirade against the Jews and their ideology that they were an inferior race was probably the most cruel excuse that they could use as an excuse for merciless killing.
Perhaps it all had to do with Hitler's stature, his oratory skills, his drilling of shitty ideas and delusions into common man. All the Germans really wanted was some kind of revolution, one that would sweep them off their feet. One that they would be proud of.
Instead all they got was a totalitarian environment, where culture and art were virtual terms, one where they were drilled with anti-Semitic ethics, one where, at the behest of Adolf Hitler, they would ultimately feel guilt. Guilt for indirectly being responsible for the death of millions. Guilt so immense that one would not speak about Nazi atrocities to his innocent children. Guilt that would finally be passed on and on till the spell of doom.
World War 2 was again an excuse for killing shit loads. What is appalling was the sheer scale of the war.The "i don't give a rats ass" attitude of those responsible for death. How death was relative and so was loss. Soldiers were forgotten warriors in this lost cause. Oppenheimer removed all the uncertainty when he made the atomic bomb. He made certain an impending doom. A doom in which, ironically, mothers would finally not have to worry if their sons were coming back home. When D-day did finally come, Robert glimpsed success, through the end of this mess. A success which actually was a parody of failures. For on that dreadful day, he signed the official papers of everything "nuclear", the papers of fear knocking on the back door, the papers of a nuclear surge and wipe out, the papers where eventually, the doomsday clock would strike 12:00. The papers that can never be burnt...
P:S- some iron maiden:)
Bombers launched with no recall
Minute warning of the missile fall
Take a look at your last day
Guessing you won't have the time to cry

Out of the the universe, a strange light was born
Unholy union, trinity reformed

Curiosity kills the...child

The terrorists have struck... again. As blatantly as humanely possible. But they've made their point. First Bangalore- they say that was just a dry run. Then the blasts in Jaipur and Ahmedabad taking many lives.
The latest strike was one that hit mehraulli in Delhi, although it didn't take many people with it ( That's the only consolation we get). One dead and about 20 injured said the official press release.. Just one person, the government would be thinking. That's the value of Human life. They quickly announce a lakh or two as compensation for the family of the deceased. They promise jobs. They make promises.
Statements are made. - The security is being reviewed.. please maintain calm and peace. We are doing all we can to get the situation under control. The culprits will be soon apprehended.
That is all to it. We must find comfort in these statements. Statements that are just said as a matter of fact.Statements that don't mean anything.
Questions are fired at the bureaucrats... They are answered plainly and flatly. The conference is wrapped up. The media have their share of debates... The BJP blame the UPA. They ask for the resignation of the P.M and the Home minister. Blame games start. The Home minister changes his attire 3 times and addresses the media. People say He's more concerned about his looks.
They're fighting fire with fire.
All this, when in some dark corner, the little victim's parents are crying unconsoled. For only they know what they've lost and the cost of it. For only they know the real feeling of loss. No one can measure such a bereavement. The only justice that may nullify their sorrows is that the terrorists are caught and hung. But we know very well their fate.
Afzal is still living. The terrorists will live too.
This is the price an innocent child had to pay for picking what he thought was a dropped parcel.
Innocence-that's all there is to it. His genious can never be realised. His parents will mourn his loss forever... The sun rises again... The little boy is forgotten... We continue to live our lives not knowing who will go next... Living with the fear that God may take us any moment. Life is cheap...Isn't it?

Being content

I've done quite a few things that I'm proud of. Yet, always, for me, happiness is something i keep deriving different meanings from. Hell i do feel good about myself sometimes, but nothing that i ever do gives me a kind of gratification that will keep me going for ever. (this is hard to put in words).
Yes i do have good memories from my past. My first PlayStation, and how i would never leave it's side. How I'd do absolutely anything to convince my dad to shell some cash for a new game. Or how I'd beg him to buy me a new board game for my birthday. And how much I'd yearn for the burger at Mc-Donalds ( i had the privilege of eating one every Friday back then:P) Then of course the stay overs. And how i would talk all night, play those silly kiddo games, scare ourselves to death with em ghost stories, have the liberty to get up late, skip those pain-staking sessions of omelet eating or oat-meal(yuck)(some i remember lasting an hour an a half:D), this of-course possible cause we threw some of it in the dustbin. How we'd ride our cycles in the evening, enjoying the cool breeze and sometimes the rain, whilst our mothers sat home and drank their teas in silence. And now, when i look back on how elated i was in the 'early days', a chilling thought dawns hard on me.... All this isn't a lasting experience. Happy experiences though they may be, and although I've been content with life sometimes, as one knows, the mind does wonder.....
My first PlayStation is at home, albeit covered in a layer of dust and cobwebs. The board games are too childish, it's just not fun anymore. A burger at mc-donalds is a rarity ( yearning i still do), stay overs we do have, although not as exciting as before. Some of my nights are spent wondering what this lesson on life really is about. Trying to define aptly the feeling of "being content" with myself, or what more should be done to come close to this...
I see lots of success around me, people who've done things that even the devil would be proud of.
I study this vtu course ( nil in the practicality department ) and often wonder where it's going to lead me. I know for sure it's not someplace I'll be "content". So then what am i doing this for?. It's that smile on my parents face when i tell them my result. ' amma result bantu-fcd and this smile with an acknowledgement'. So should i be content with myself now that i see that my parents are.? Is my being a millionaire going to be enough?.
Who's going to judge me and say- You've been a good person. You've done it all. Are these magical words contentment.
Bruce Dickinson of the iron maiden fame is a trained opera singer, a lovely writer, hell he flies planes, was selected for the British Olympic team, has his own show on BBC, and moreover has sold more than 80 million albums with maiden, has ownage when they play. Yet He says he isn't content. If all this isn't ravishing, then what is? what is?
Will the day ever come when i sit my grandchildren down for a chat and tell them---your old man did this---your old man did that, with them staring back in awe. Then I'll finally know for sure that i did what i was sent out to do. Only then will i have this solace that god can take me away. Do you agree?

P:S- How can i intimate all this to my most intimate friend.... The heart;)

The burning bridge

The burning bridge that nothing can rebuild;
is positively a foundation on which to build!
The re-birth of this artery is acutely sought;
Although the building blocks always fought.
Praying to god won't keep it alive;
The bridge will surely fall, sans revive.
wavy and swelly, while it still may be;
salvage it not, and you'll pay the fee.
Water in its en masse, clearly a winner;
Find none and it will surely simmer.
shaping from scratch may be the last resort;
Fail again and it will unerringly wrought.
Pry out the water and save the bridge;
Else you'll be snared to a friggin ridge.
But where is the water in this barren land;
surely its not concealed deep in the sand...

P.S- I'd like to think that this is the poetic version of my previous post-reality bites:P

Reality bites

There are times such as now, where i'm sure many guys are going through the 'phase' that so affliates itself with me these days. Exactly what this phase is, is very hard to put in words, but will try so here goes. For a while now, i've been engulfed with this "thing" that fills me to the brim. ( i'm using "thing" cause i can't think of a stronger word) The "thing"connotes itself with a distortionless sine wave. ( can't help i study this shit all day). An up followed by a down. This is an example of how a normal day would go for me.

(Reality)- I take the same route to college, ride the same vehicle at a constant speed,stop at the same traffic signals, occasionaly catch a glimpse of a beauty (oh ya this is an upside), then rush to class asap with the prospect of getting a spot on the last bench. Then stand up as the teachers enter and leave, faking regard and respect. Then pretend to listen to their pointless lectures all the while staring in interim at the watch!! Then get really pissed when the bugger leaves without taking attendance. Then wonder why i even attended. Then catch a glimpse of the cute girl who's been driving me nuts for months. Picture myself finally asking her out ( i'm clearly daydreaming:D). Lunch in the same old canteen. Back to class, back out.
Same vehicle,same route, same traffic signals,back home. I've retraced my path.
I'm not complaining about the lack of variations. It's just that i don't do shit about it. My day could've easily been like......
(castle in the air:P)- For a change, i could go late to college, bunk a few classes to catch a movie, skip the traffic signals;), show the finger to the cop on duty busy digging his nose, zoom in at high speeds, hit the brakes hard. swerve in traffic, smile and wink at the beauty, then go to class late, actually don't give a shit and sit in the first bench, or bunk and tell my friend-macha proxy!!
Go to a fancy restaurant for lunch, sit side by side with the cutie whom i just asked out, make her pay the bill:p , then get her number and actually make use of my stupid messaging plan.

The thing is, "things" don't work this way for moi. If i wanted to build the castle in the air, i would've done it long ago. That's why there's a clear demarcation between reality and the castle.:P There are some lessons in life which i just don't get. The heart says build the castle but the mind condemns the idea. The mind makes all my moves.
I know that i can decide my destiny and make the necessary changes, but i don't know how and when to start. The outcome isn't important, it's the passage i'm worried about. I hate this yin-yang angle to everything. Everything has to be weighed. It's pure madness!
The alchemist presents a clear cut message. It tells people to follow their dreams. Thing is- my dreams are cloudy.:)

dear god!

Religion vs science. A dicey comparison i must say. Weigh all the odds but still one is confused. Certainly very ambiguous.

Man vs wild sounds better!!. Now, when does one look to god for answers and when does he look to science. Ten years ago, i wouldn't have had an idea. We all grew up with the belief and notion that God is the Creator and that he is at the top of the rung. Hell I'm pretty sure science was not even in the picture.Religion and science were incompatible back then. Poor little kids we were. Boy did we have those nightmares where them devilish faces-phases too and ghastly shadows would creep up behind our backs and in our sleep and help us aggravate our miseries ;). We'd quietly say our prayers and go to bed with hope that "god" would answer our prayers. No susu that night was often the desired result.

With that notion behind us, I mean way behind us, we've all outgrown ourselves and often ponder about the mighty ones existence in iffy situations. Where is god when we most dearly need him! Does he send his messengers to help us, or do we take a walk down scientific avenue. How are we to know that god will come, see and conquer.

About a year back, on the way back from a real fun road trip, two of my friends had a horrible accident. Head on with another vehicle at a very high speed. Fortunately, both of them escaped with minor injuries and the bike took most of the batter. That same morning, we paid a visit to a temple where one of the guys did an apradakshina ( dunno the right word) or basically he went around the temple in the anticlockwise sense- the wrong "sense" literally. Was god angry then? Was the accident all about revenge? Or did he actually save our asses because another friend and myself did 3 rounds (pradakshinas) with our hearts into it. One will never know! It's impossible for me (a year on still) to ever know who played spoilsport that day. (or rather saved them guys). Although science does offer us answers, like say probably cause the crash guard and the bumper took all the impact, I'm very much inclined to believe that it was god's hand. Thank god for that!

In another instance, lets take the example of a dying man in coma. Suddenly, one fine day he wakes up out of it and is doing just fine. People would say things like god saved his ass and god is great blah blah blah. However, the rationale would point our heads in the scientific direction. Maybe he responded well to treatment and decided it was time to "Come back to life".

I've known for a fact that the Nile is known to turn red when filled with bacteria. May moses' soul rest in peace:)

Faith and fate synonymous with god and science. Both these entities have their own definition of "truth". God's truth is laid down and carved out long ago. Truth in science comes from trial and error, experiments and so on and so forth. So who offers us a good version of the truth remains to be seen.

Is love a proof of god? Is faith a good thing?. Why can't god find a compromise with science. Why can't they work in tandem. The proof of god is the happening of miracles everyday. Science gives us logical explanations. But it does sometimes fail us. The example of black magic where one person does omething with a few lemons, chants a few mantras and wham some guy is cursed. I do hope that GOD finds neutral ground soon. Perhaps these two entities are one and the same. The only logical solution.

P.S: Robert Frost once wrote- two roads diverged in a yellow wood. I took the one less travelled by, And that has made all the difference. What the hell was he talking about.

Beijing

This is to discuss to some extent the phenomenon that was the 2008 Olympics thus far, and the reactions in India to the same. Whilst the vivid and colourful opening ceremony was taking place, with the I.O.A president Suresh Kalmadi a witness to greatness, history was surely made.
The aura surrounding the national stadium, nicknamed the bird's nest for obvious reasons on the evening of 08/08/08 is indescribable. They even kicked off at 8 pm:). Picture this- India wants to host the Olympics too. Say they win the bid for the 2020 Olympics ( 2016 they'll probably lose in the first round). And the opening ceremony is scheduled to start at 8 pm on some date...
By Indian standard time "standards", it's very safe to say that the chief guest( or should i say chief guests- numbering a hundred or so incompetent bastards ) turn up by nine. People like Deve Gowda ( I have nothing against him), Lalu Yadav, Mayawati ( a prime ministerial candidate:p ) and a bunch of other losers, wearing them dhoti's and those "towels", chewing paan in the vvip box. So yeah, you get the picture.
Let's assume that by 2020, these vvips' attires change for the better. Screw presentation and attire and behaviour for the moment.
The real deal is, can we get the money approved for investment. Can we for once, see to it that no sub-standard work is carried out. Can we vie, toil, push on with courage to try and emulate the Chinese. I strongly believe WE CAN and we're obliged to. We're a country of a billion people, a Country with culture and heritage like none other.
We have it all. The talent in any field be it science or technology or sport. We lack execution. We are not able to impersonate and dramatise "the prestige of the magic trick" that is the Olympic dream. India has in its realm a prolific culture. Be it music, folklore, heritage, literature or anything for that matter. We have it all!!! What better stage to showcase just a gist of our greatness, than the summer Olympics.
The only possible way we can do this is to somehow keep politics and bureaucrats away! (Maybe slip them some land deeds or money under the table:D). Ndtv and other leading news-broadcasters had debates on whether we can host an 'Olympic games', and not surprisingly, the answer was no. A similar reason being too much disruption at the bureaucratic level.
So it is time, to stop talking and putting our asses to work. Mario Puzo once wrote- actions speak. Words are like fart in the air:p . I couldn't agree more!! Though we're light years away, we're definitely inching closer. We'll be there surely!! Round one action- 2010 commonwealth games.
A win or a loss remains to be seen. Cheers.

Just a thought. Isn't it ironic how an autocratic nation with Hu Jintao as premier, who has a say in everything, gets all the work done while India, the biggest democracy take everything to the parliament where we veto it, or leave it to the judiciary to decide. We're still in that "feel good factor" phase. All chiched. No use

intro

Firstly, i must admit that the blog title i copied from somewhere and i myself, at this very moment don't quite remember it. Every blogger is obliged to put up a "title" and the reason i chose this was simply because it is gibberish!! If you Google search this, you'll see exactly what i mean. :) This very word is pronounced very atrociously i must say. ( no pun intended). On the other hand, according to the walt disney film, it's defined as- "what you say when you don't know what to say". So it's very apt too and i think it's the best word to describe my forthcoming blogs!!

Last night, i had this dream where in " i was actually blogging" so i was like to hell with it why not give it a shot and see what the fuss was all about. I must say i'm rather enjoying myself already though i haven't even typed more than 200 characters:P. I have nothing else to say, that'll be it for tonight. I'm sure i'm going to be using this portal very soon. Till then adios.