Tuesday, March 30, 2010

True story.

One Night 4 college students were playing till late night and could not
study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty  with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had  gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car  burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in  no condition to appear for the test.

So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked
him and said they would be ready by that time.

On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this  was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate  classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the  last 3 days.

The Test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks

Q.1. Your Name.......................... (2 MARKS)

Q.2. which tire burst? (98 MARKS)

a) Front Left

b) Front Right

c) Back Left

d) Back Right.....!!!

True story from IIT Bombay ...
Batch 1992

 How much should one plan before telling a lie? One might think he's covered all possible angles, but, shit happens:)

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Profane poetry! (continued)

Wow! That was quite a lay,
And I didn't even have to pay.
God has been kind to me today;
Hope I can keep the guilt at bay.

Whilst she was making some tea,
I tried my best to see,
If this was really me
Or some crazy-ass fantasy.

She floated across and said:'My dear,
You may choke a tear;
You have nothing to fear,
For I was never even here'!

I woke up on a Hospital bed,
'I was hallucinating', the nurses said.
I think I surely am losing my head,
And to top it all, I am newly-wed:)

P.S- In the words of Lt. Aldo Raine-   "I think this just might be my masterpiece".

Monday, March 15, 2010

I hate you!

Murphy, I bleddy hate you. First, you convince the no-good-retard cable fellow to not broadcast Star Sports. And he actually listens. He gives the redundant neo sports. All they play is cricket, which, frankly I don't care about.
If it was India-OZ, then that's an entirely acceptable situation. Seriously, I'd rather be in exile or arrested than watch Arun Lal use the word 'Leg-side-ish'. Wtf does that even mean? I know what leg-side and off-side is.Why the ish at the end. He's as good as Inzamam when it comes to usage of the English language.

Has anyone heard of the word 'wickat'? If so, can you please tell me. I don't know what 'wickat' has to do with the game of cricket. So cut it off with the neo sports atrocious crap. Instead, give me Star Sports!
I want to watch some tennis. So why do all the sports channels i get only play the cliched game of 'crickat'. I'm fed up of Siddhu and his exorbitant usage of idioms. How does he even qualify as an 'expert' on the analysis of an I.P.L game?
Mr Modi, Whatever you do, I.P.L will never be as good as the E.P.L. Football is in another league of itself.

Like I said, I'm fed up. Murphy even convinced the print media to put I.P.L on the front page. And why is Swami Nityananda mentioned again? Murphy molested by him too? :P
The charity tennis match for Haiti, featuring the four greats Sampras, Fedex, Agassi and Nadal wasn't even mentioned. Plus I didn't even get to watch it, thanks to you.
I call up the cable guy today. Some lady answers. I tell her to give Star Sports instead of Star Cricket. But no. Seriously hasn't everyone seen enough cricket?

I call up my uncle and tell him I'm coming home to watch Rafa Nadal's match. He tells me there's no power. Apparently a Truck Driver rammed into the Power tower on his street. I guess i'll never have my way.
I hope the truck driver's arrested for damage of public property:)

Monday, March 1, 2010

Iron Maiden: part two

                                                      The band- From left to right:
       Janick Gers, Adrian Smith, Bruce Dickinson, Steve Harris, Dave Murray, Nicko Mcbrain
Iron Maiden have about 2000 live shows to their credit. Their sets have always been full of vigour and much veracity in the singing department by the great Bruce Dickinson.
Dickinson's interests include literature, writing and fencing. He was a member of the British Fencing squad for a while, but had to forfeit his place as he was on tour for Maiden.
 He is also widely known in metal circles as the 'Air Raid Siren', which was popularly coined during the recording of the hit single -The Number of the beast. 

The reason He was called so was because the producer was un-impressed with the tone with which he sang the first four lines. At one point, Bruce got so frustrated that he let out a very high on octave wail about one min into the song, which wasn't originally supposed to be there. It is been noted that Bruce hasn't been able to re-create the same pitch ever again. : Hear for yourself!

Nevertheless, Iron Maiden are an incomplete band without this song, as well as the album of the same name. It is one of their staple tracks in live performances. It's quite impossible to fathom how Bruce manages to breeze through night after night. He just never disappoints.
As I said in my previous Maiden post, Steve is the brainchild. But Bruce is the singing power. He's the showman. He brings the X-factor to the table every time they perform.

One of the key reasons they're still alive and kicking, even after thirty years is the support of their fans. Iron Maiden failed to receive any Mainstream media support for thirty years! (even to this day). They were ridiculed in the U.S for their 'trivial' links with Satan, and even though Clarifications were issued to the same, No one in the darned media complied. In fact,None of the members of Maiden worship Satan. They're theist or agnostic.
Despite minimal support when they just about started out, They continued to make music for themselves and their fans, something other bands failed to do. Thirty years and fourteen albums older, They still present a bad ass set every time they hit the stage. I must say that a bunch of 50 year olds running around on stage, jumping about, with all sorts of antics manifests in the 'Drive' and passion that the band still have. It really is difficult to put in writing.
So far starters, for those of you who haven't been addicted to Maiden yet- Brave New World is a good start up album. I got addicted hearing this itself:)

Oh well, wherever, wherever you are
Iron Maiden's going to get you, no matter how far
See the blood flow watching it shed up above my head
Iron Maiden wants you for dead

 I'll say this: If you haven't seen Maiden live yet, that's one thing you ought to do ASAP, or you're simply missing out on probably one of the most memorable days of your life.
I say this because I feel music is no more an agglomeration of emotions these days; It is more to do with commercial success. But with Iron Maiden, It is just that! Emotion and much more...