Oblivion

It was a little after five; I entered the coffee house only to find a significant number of people already standing in queue for takeout. It was almost closing time. Damn. I was already running late on a few errands. I figured i could get my way easy by chatting up the cute cashier guy. But as i started moving forward, a miserly old man told me to get back in line.
Not another wise-ass I thought, not in the least paying heed to his age or his 'principles'.
So there i was, already late, and now impatient. I noticed how a few heads were turned in my direction, and i must say i wasn't surprised.

The gaze of one particular man caught my attention. There he was, sitting cross-legged at a table a few feet away from me. I could sense his eyes scanning my rocking body. Only, i couldn't see his eyes. It was safely hidden behind a set of shades. Maybe to filter the haze from the sun, i thought.
I knew he was constantly looking, taking in the sights. But i didn't have the pleasure of knowing, for sure, that he was guilty of it. My self imposed smugness was slowly building. And why not.
I was wearing a knee length skirt, the hem of which kept flickering upwards whenever the door to the coffee house opened, and a chilling breeze floated across. Anyone would sight this "sight".I didn't mind this at all.
I had gorgeous skin; olive and silky to the touch. Guys who perpetually ogle me, tell me that i remind them of Ana Ivanovic. No bullshit. My ego was sky high.
The yellow pull-over was not doing a good job of concealing the skin above my waist. And i must say, i tried very hard to not do any shielding.
Obviously, this accentuated the lust and longing i could so easily see in the eyes around me.
This was my zone now. Suddenly, time seemed so relative.

My thought-ego process was abruptly halted. A little girl in front of me turned back and asked the man in the shades: ' Dad, do you want a cup-cake?'
He nodded inattentively.His gaze was still fixated on me.
I thought to myself: ' A married man? With a kid! Does he not love his life? Maybe his sex life is a failure. I couldn't picture him to be a happy family man. The lust i thought i 'sensed', gave it all away. Ah! What did i care!!'
I paid for my take-out, gave the man another look, only to get one back. I walked out onto the street.
As the sun began its journey to set on the horizon, my complacency and ego started to rise again.

P:S- The man in the shades gathered his walking stick, and called out to his daughter. Together, they meandered out onto the open road. He was blind.
The woman's ego was not a high rise building. It merely was a stack of dominos:)

18th september

Our College Entrance
Well, let me start by mentioning the significance of this day. It was on this very day, exactly three years ago, when i first stepped foot into college. Engineering College that is.

We had what our Faculty called an 'Orientation' program, which actually was pretty much an excuse for us to waste time, as well as for our parents to sit and listen. So I took liberty to take a stroll and take in the sights and sounds. I still remember how the seniors were looking down on us with some smugness, as if to say Be Aware, or we'll scare:)

So basically I was told to keep a low profile, which i easily managed to do. The next day, we had Maths class at 8:30. I didn't know what to expect. I didn't know anyone that well either. We were made to introduce ourselves, say a few words, why we took engineering, the works! I don't remember much, but what i do remember is i managed not to get ragged the first week.

I used to attend labs and classes diligently, Sit silently in class and actually listen!. I was quite a nerd the first year...

Three years on, A lot has changed. I now flaunt the smugness that my seniors flaunted a few years ago. My ego has gone sky high( The 'we are the seniors' ego, i mean:P). I still do attend classes, but listening to pointless lectures is a farce. Bunking labs is no more a sin. Then, I used to reach class five minutes beforehand. Now, I've learnt that it's okay to leave home fifteen minutes past the time when i actually have to be in class:)
So, perspectives have changed. We've gained maturity. Learnt from mistakes. Learnt how to make chits, and copy from "micro xerox". We've learnt how not to fuck around in class. We've learnt how to write apology letters, and maskafy teachers. We weigh our options, and use the one most mitigating to our "cause".
Some things have been the same. The same rains still lash our campus, as the result of which we still take shelter in the 'Gaadi Stand'. The 'Gaadi Stand' fellow still charges Rs 2/- per day. The chocolate milkshake in Yampa(our milk parlour) still are so yummy!! And our 'machas' still go to 'downs' to smoke up. The clouds still meander about, playing hide and seek with us, taunting us like we thought our seniors did.Every year, Old chicks leave, and junior chicks come.
I guess what i'm trying to say is, although a lot as changed since 18th September 2006, Our hearts are still rooted to this place.

A place that has always given me something, even though, at times, i have taken nothing from it. I'm actually scared of letting go in a year's time. And that's the reason i wrote this in the first place.
P:S- I think i can find solace in the fact that I'll be seeing that Entrance board for another year:). but then what?

If God plays a fender Strat, would he not sound like David Gilmour?

amores perros:)

I can see the love in those sparkling eyes;
Those eyes many a fathom deep.
They tell me of things that can't be said,
For the eyes do the talking.
Everytime I look in them deep oceans,
I fight for some clarity of sorts.
Thoughts flow freely, like a mighty river.
Soon i'm asking myself-Is she the one?
Then a smile etches across my besieged face,
It accentuates the feelings from deep within.
The fear lifts, i see the light;
Only to realise that i've lost my sight:)

P:S-A modified version of my first ever poem:P
Written on 4th August,2007.

Dreams!

My mom keeps telling me i have a lot of potential. She means to say i'm shit brainy but not the least bit hardworking. Atleast that's what i think:P.
I've always been good at Maths. Throughout my life, it's always been my forte (Thank you nickil for the word). I breezed through the Math exams in school, managed 99 in the Tenth boards, 97 again in 12th. Wrote K.CET without any qualms about anything, because, frankly, i was adequately prepared. The bomb came when the results were announced. Everyone at home thought i'd get around the 500th rank. I managed to somehow get 157. I couldn't believe it.
This insignificant number, harboured no significance at all till that glorious day in mid-may 0f '06. All my life i was a mediocre student. Never hogged any limelight. Now i knew what i was capable of. 99.99 percentile!
The regrets soon followed. I.I.T and N.I.T were in my realm of possiblities. Physics and Maths were my holding ground. But yet somehow, the opportunity slipped. I never paid heed to this significant moment in my life.
Three years have gone by. College apparently 'changes' people. The truth of the matter is, It was three years ago i last "studied". Shit happens they say. Now, i'm actually thinking about where my life is heading as opposed to where it could have been.
So i'm going to find me-self one of those job things, work for a few years, and then join the Indian School of Business.Talk about realising potential. There aren't going to be any compromises this time.
This insignificant little blog post is going to be witness to a very gratified event later on. Now here's my inspiration..

F1 India not on track?

The latest news doing rounds is that the Sports ministry has rejected the 'Basic idea' of the Indian Grand Prix in '11. Mr Gill, ( Not to be confused with Gill, the former president of IHF:P)
has said that Formula One is not a sport. Apparently, F1 is just 'expensive entertainment', as opposed to our National Game Hockey. Not like we're doing any good at it. With the so called 'revival' and all, things may change.
Coming back, seriously? Not a sport. So the battering of 4 plus G's that the drivers experience as well as the very simple 'matter' of staying fit enough to drive those cars (Rather Machines) doesn't qualify? I don't know what does. The truth of the matter is that it is the most expensive sport there is.

Here's a definition for cricket: 'You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!' Does this even make sense?
So much for T20 and the IPL. Cricket is a religion, and F1 soon will be too!
I don't see how anyone stands to lose out on money. So what's the problem.
Will someone pay Gill his Bill? :)
Maybe Dr Mallya will.